Communicating Effectively with Persons Living with Dementia
Supporting some with cognitive decline requires shifting our speech to communicate effectively. The brain’s ability to process and respond to information slows down with a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease, or other dementias. Shifting our speech will feel clumsy and awkward at first, but it is well worth your time to practice the strategies below to improve communication and create connectedness and a more meaningful relationship.
- Be patient, giving enough time for the person to respond in conversation. An individual experience changes in cognitive functioning takes longer to put his/her thoughts together.
- Replace the word “remember” with either “I was thinking about.” or “I recall.” These words put less pressure on an individual who may feel same when she/he is having trouble “remembering” things.
- If the person repeats a question, be mindful not to respond by “reminding” the person you already answered the question. With short term memory loss, the person has no recollection of the answer, or even if they asked a question. Instead, kindly repeat the answer, thus saving the individual feelings of shame. A reasonable question desires a reasonable answer.
- An overly stimulating environment can become overwhelming for someone who has difficulty regulating emotions or processing information. When at a social gathering or out in public, find quiet spaces to take breaks.
- Avoid correcting the person if details of a story shared are inaccurate. The person may fill in the blanks with wrong information because that memory is gone. The person is quick to adapt and fill in a different place, date, or event to be able to continue telling the story. Please understand, the person is not lying and doing the best they can to engage with others and feel a sense of belonging. Correcting the person will only cause feelings of shame or sadness. Focus on the person’s feelings, not facts.
- When asking the person a question, use clear and concise language, and only ask one question at a time. More than this will be overwhelming. Using visual cues is helpful when the person is making choices. Show the red and blue shirt to the person and ask which they prefer.
- Use positive and encouraging language. This will help the person feel successful, thus, making engagement more meaningful throughout the day.
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
-Maya Angelou
If you, a friend or family member living with memory loss would be interested in learning more about our Memory Café, Family and Friends Workshops or other services we provide, please contact Vicky Pitner at vpitner@fumc.org