A New Reality of Golf

Vicky Pitner   -  

Friends often fade away when a friend is diagnosed with a type of a neurocognitve disorder such Alzheimer’s diseases or another type of dementia. However, from my experience, friends miss their friend and feel confused and left out of the person’s life. They just don’t know how to connect.

I friend of mine had a dear golfing buddy that developed Alzheimer’s disease. She had tried golfing, a passion they shared, but was frustrated because her friend was not holding the club correctly and did not understand the game any longer. We explored ways they could continue this hobby together again and it be fun.

With support and encouragement, my friend was able to change her expectations of what golf meant and began to live in her friends reality. She realized it was their friendship that really mattered, not the game of golf. They would go to the course and ride in the golf cart and were able to continue to share in the joy this activity brought.

Because my friend was able to change her reality and expectations of what golf really meant, she continued to adapt other interests they shared and were able to maintain their friendship.

When we stop expecting persons living with memory loss to “remember” a particular skill and begin to meet the person where they are and live in the moment with them, we can maintain meaningful relationships